Long post warning!….. Seriously, it’s CRAZY long ????
Hi, my name is Pam and I’m an emotional, stress, middle of the night, , I’ve worked so hard, let me reward myself eater …..or at least, I used to be….. So two of these pics show my actual stomach, so apologies????. I thought about posting other pics, but decided to post “the whole truth and nothing but the truth” pics in all their glory. The reason being because you truly can see EXACTLY where I was at. I don’t recognise myself. That’s not WHO I was…or was it? It’s like this wierd, Dr Jeckle and Mr Hyde vibe. I am absolutely amazed at just how much my actual personality changed when I started gaining so much weight. It’s like this other version of myself took over. This version who had 0% self esteem, who didn’t want to go out and see people, (ESPECIALLY old friends or people I hadn’t seen in a while) who couldn’t seem to just relax and have fun and just LIVE life to its fullest. It’s almost as if I was “angrier” too. At myself, at the world, at this life I had unintentionally created for myself. Anyone who knew me pre, “I gained 36kgs when I was pregnant” weight, would tell you that I was a very outgoing, confident, happy person, and honestly, I was. Then life happened, pregnancy came around, and slowly as the years ticked by, it became harder and harder for me to change back, internally and externally. I think what bothers me the most when I look at my old pictures is not so much how I looked, but how I FELT. I think that for me, personally, it was an internal, emotional, comfort issue. I bought the HCG injections from The Diet Doctor in April 2019, but, I didn’t feel ready to use them. I was so scared I was going to just waste them. So, I held off taking them and very slightly started looking at the eating plan you get with the program (but by no means stuck to it strictly at all). In November last year I decided that enough was enough! I was tired of buying clothes JUST because they hid as much as possible. I was tired of this version of myself I had become! I was ready to make the DECISION to change! I started taking the injections and following the eating program and couldn’t believe the results! I decided to not only work on my body, but my heart and mind as well-to practice true self love! Now, I’m not going to lie, December was tough and I really struggled to stay on track, but I pushed forward DESPITE all my “epic fails”,  by not giving up. And then it was as if Harry Houdini appeared out of nowhere, waved his magic wand (not sure if he ever actually had one????) and poof, the “old”, but much younger looking Pam was back!!!! I have lost a total of 23.5 kgs so far. From November 2019 till January 2020 I stuck to my guns.  Day by day, choice by choice, I am remembering who I used to be, internally and externally. I know that even when I reach my goal, I will continue to use many elements of the programs eating plan because it just MAKES SO MUCH SENSE! I realise this post is crazy long, but I figured if I’m going to “bare ma belly” to the world, I may as well hit what was at the heart of it for me because hopefully it can help someone out there take that step! When I first joined, I honestly didn’t realise just how huge a part the group would play, let alone just how effective this program is! I was filled with so much doubt in all directions, from various gimmicks and my previous “failures”, I was afraid to even get my hopes up. Today, I can’t explain just how grateful I am for The Diet Doctor, the HCG injections and more importantly, this group! The love, support and encouragement has, for me personally, been the most important and precious factor of this whole experience. Of course the internal and external factors may be different for everyone, and I’ve met a lot of amazing, confident, beautiful, powerful people who are overweight, so of course it’s not to say that this applies to everyone, but my point is that it was how IIIIII felt and if you do relate and you feel the way I did, take comfort in the fact that no matter the reason you got to where you are physically, no matter how impossible it seems , IT IS COMPLETELY possible to actually make that change and SEE IT THROUGH! #YOUCANDOIT!